Feeling worthless..

 If someone was actually following up my blog he/she would feel my life is a complete drag on.It's not actually.I have many happy blissful days when i am all gung ho about life.But it's not in that mood i feel like writing blog.It's actually on days like this one has patience and motivation to scribble sorry type some soulful words in this space and sent to world wide web.Now i feel why in olden days people used to write a note, put it in bottle cork it and throw it in big wide ocean.So that some day someone or even lucky they themselves could uncork it and feel nostalgic.That's why we love literature.Anybody's thoughts feelings.I think it is some aspect of human civilization called communication.They have a very severe punishment called solitary confinement to stop this pleasure.I feel nothing would be the same if we have no body to talk to.
  Well i am feeling so worthless.I hate HPCL.If i hadn't got a call for interview from there i would have been somewhere not here repeating the things again and again.They almost made me believe that i was good enough and interview will be a cake walk.So overconfident me.And i stopped studying.Got myself more involved into my family which further made it worse.Interview happened pretty late.I almost got sick of opening their page in internet explorer.I can't fathom the reason all psu prefer it.It came so late and at a bad timing.Things were not great at home.I screwed up the interview with my nervousness in which i tend to speak more and more without thinking twice.My mother helped it in too.She came inside office in her dress asking when it will be over.So they got it done first.May be not a favorable impression.I just want to cry over that lost chance or split milk as you can say.It was my first.I was so uselessly hopeful.Lost dreams lesson gained.Don't go inside unprepared.And never bring your mom who is so audacious with you.Had it hurt her if she could just wait outside like anyone.I ve said her good bye and she ought to wait in her car.But God knows why after 15 min she shows up in office.I hate her face of that day now.May be i need to cover up my own short comings.What hurts more is instant on your face rejection.I just got out one man told me to wait.He went up inside came out and told sorry.That's it.I wished they'll call me back.E mail me or whatever but it never happen.My mom wanted to go back and ask the reason of my rejection.How stupid.


 The reason i am remembering all this is that everyone i know are at some seemingly wonderful places doing job, M tech, MBA, MS and what not.And i am here ranting about my failed attempts..What can i say.It hurts..A LOT.. 

Hyderabad....

 Living in Hyderabad is a pleasure for me.It rains almost every day and sun is usually absent for better part of day.You must carry your rain preventing equipment always.Even if there is not a single cloud and sun is shining.You never know.And when it pours it could make you bath in 5 seconds.If i have seen most heavy downpour here then the i have also seen the most misty rain.It appears like dew is falling a little bit fast.The tiny rain drops almost struggle to stay afloat on air.You can only see them on water surfaces which ripples as if wind is blowing.But it's the rain.
  I wonder if people in Hyderabad ever talk about weather.It's always the same here.In Delhi it's impossible to have conversation without it.On the up side weather is hardly a problem like it's never too humid nor too hot or too cold obviously if you don't mind rain.
 There are plenty of problems as well.People have extremely irritating habit to spit on the road.You can hardly walk 10 steps without jumping or siding to avoid one with mucus.They feel no shame in doing so as well.It's Hyderabad who taught me to wear fully covering shoes all the time.
 I love the narrow alleys here.In few places room are so built that you wonder if you are in public road or somebody's home.Each home is unique telling about period of it making ,remaking or adding floors.Most humble ground floor can bloom into elegant balconies in first floors or more.Houses are usually 4 or more floors.So i end up travelling vertically more.What i hate that these homes have their water pipes opening in almost middle of narrow street.As a mechanical engineer at least .375 of the road length.So it's impossible far a street traveler to move without getting dirty water on his/her head.Else you have to be impossibly careful.
 The water draining system is quite okay.You may wonder why rain water doesn't stay more that 5 min on road than rain.Well every pavement has a slope and many manholes which apart from giving you a bumpy ride drains the water quickly.Apart from these there are small more holes opening in drainage below.Makes me wonder if every road has drainage flowing below.
  Here, water comes once in two days.So people store water in sinks in ground and of course water tanks on roof.Rest of the water from supply is just let to flow on the road carelessly.Talk about water conservation, i have seen water pipes without taps.I don't know how could they not realize water is precious.
  Transport is fine.But traffic is huge.Even people walking on road can get struck.But clothes and food is cheap.You get copies  in kilograms like 30 rs kg or 60 depending on page quality.
 Luckily i am blessed with nice room and nicer room partner so no troubles.Only glitch seems to be frequent absence of my tiffin which ups my budget enormously.Especially on sunday when most shops and eating places are closed..
Studies are great with my routine of getting up as early as 4 o clock.Mom was always right about early mornings...May be they always are..